"Captain's log, stardate 52364.5. The situation is starting to normalize here. Those people from Adamsburg who survived are back in their homes, already contemplating how they're going to replant their gardens and how to bring in some trees. Many saw nothing more than the location where they first appeared, but over time, no doubt they'll want to talk to counselors and others who are going to deal with this. Adamsburg might change anyway, since that whole alien structure is now clearly visible, and Starfleet is already sending an archaeology team to look it at. When the power went down everywhere, the damage that we had done to the structure in the mine became apparent. A gaping hole suddenly appeared. I even had my first look at the structure, now totally and completely inert. Right now, the Odonans are scattered all over Charamand, put up wherever we could find room for them. Most are shocked by what had happened in the past sixty-one years. The Odonan evacuation ship that will take them home should be here within a week. And of course, I continue to wait. Doctor Psakolaps has kept Matsubara unconscious as she recovers, but he is no longer maintaining any artificial manipulation of her neural functions. Any time now, I would imagine."
The Acropolis was, as usual, a centre of activity, with people coming and going, and with the main topic of conversation being what those who had been on the lander had seen and experienced. The second most common topic of conversation was what happened next.
In the middle of that was Rocha, who stood near the window, looking down at Charamand. From this height, the denuded section of the planet was visible as this curiously round area of brown among the usual lush greens of the class-M world. "You still brooding?" came the voice from behind. Rocha turned, and saw that it was Johnson. She was cradling a mug of Orion coffee in her hands.
"I'm still wondering... if I did the right thing," the security chief said.
"The captain says that you did."
"I think what he meant was that what I did was defensible. Nobody will accuse me of doing something wrong, but in my mind, I still wonder if I did enough. Did I talk to the Salosians enough? Did I manage to stall them enough to give that last group of Odonans a chance, or did I condemn them to stay on that planet?"
"They could've returned to their location."
"The Salosians would've found them eventually," Rocha continued. "There were not that many left. Based on those that did come back, maybe twenty, twenty-five were left behind, not counting the troopers. That might not have been a viable number. Now, unless something happens here, and the power reappears, we have to conclude that the tricobalt device did its job and totally destroyed the power source. Those survivors wouldn't have their replicators, their power source, nothing at all but a barren, cold planet to live on-and maybe not even that if the atmosphere was somewhat artificial. I doomed them."
"I understand, Alex," Johnson said, softly, as she stood beside the man. "Surely you realize that you acted at the point that the Salosians were poised to attack. Had they gotten through, who knows how many would've died, especially those who were inside the structure, unable to get out."
"I know that. I was talking upto that point. Maybe I should've tried to negotiate."
"Based on what you said in the debriefings, the Salosians weren't really interested. It's hard to really understand their mindset, to know what their true intentions were. Do you think they were blinded by that much hatred of the Dorans?"
"Perhaps. Based on the reports at what was found at the Salosian site, I can understand it."
"Then maybe negotiations were doomed to fail."
Turning to face the woman, and smiling at her, Rocha said, "I know, I've heard a lot of things, a lot of comments, a lot of advice, even. It's hard to say whether or not I made the right decision, or whether I did the right thing, or approached it the right way. I'll need time to think about it. You know, at that moment, I felt I was not quite ready for such a responsibility. I didn't want it. For a fleeting second, I didn't want it, maybe because I knew that this kind of doubt might linger in my mind."
"But in the end, you did what you had to do."
"I did what needed to be done, not what I had to do." After a pause, he added, "There is a difference, you know."
* * *
"Come," Thorpe said, in response to the door chimes. He looked up from the computer terminal, where he was continuing to go through the crew reports on their experiences. His next job was to form a coherent, well-written report for Starfleet Command, appended with all of this other information. Perhaps right now a break was what he needed. He was vaguely hoping that the person on the other side of the ready room door was the doctor, coming to report good news.
That was not who came through the door. Instead, it was Captain Nozhe Padda, from the Bluestar. The petite Odonan woman, her long hair in a thick braid down her back, was carrying a padd. "Captain," she said, her high-pitched voice carrying through the translation in the implant. "I've just received information from home, including a message from Councilor Chiang."
"Yes?"
Padda took up the unspoken offer and sat down in one of the chairs in front of the desk. "The information concerns the fate of those left behind on the Small Magellanic Cloud planet, especially the officers in the Odonan Ground Forces. It was known that given the distance and the nature of the separation, the bond-links between Odonans and related individuals here were broken. However, two of the troopers had unusually strong bond-links with their mates back home, and both reported that the bonds were intact even after the transit to the distant planet. However, both reported a sudden termination of the bond-links, and as far as we can correlate the time sufficiently, between here and home and so on, it looks like the termination occurred within two to three minutes after your security chief detonated the tricobalt device."
"It destroyed the planet?"
"I was talking it over with my science officer. I'm not exactly sure what a solar subspace tap involves, but it may involve a tiny component of the sun actually existing in that spire. It's possible that the explosion might've disrupted the containment of that tap. Essentially what happened was that whatever secured that piece of the sun was destroyed. Now, imagine how much pressure something like that would be under. It would expand tremendously fast, and the destructive energies released could easily be enough to devastate the planet. My officer imagined a scenario in which this released energy could basically wash over the planet, destroying everything in its wake, including the artificially-maintained atmosphere."
Looking up at the Odonan commander, Thorpe said, "This almost sounds like I made the wrong decision."
"It's not my place to state that you made the wrong decision, captain," Padda replied. "I'm simply stating what might have happened."
"But the planet and its technology-and all of those lives-are destroyed."
"That seems likely, yes."
Thorpe leaned back, and had to ask himself-had to wonder-how much was his responsibility. He had spent a sleepless night-a night in which he really needed to sleep-wondering if his relationship with Matsubara might have influenced what he had done. Now when he looked back on it, he felt he had a single-minded pursuit, to get Matsubara back to the safety of the Athena, the safety of his starship. He had to wonder if he made wrong decisions, or rash decisions, based on what his true and unstated purpose was. He had taken chances, and extracted a great cost, to get his companion back to this galaxy. These feelings, he realized, he would have to deal with on his own. He could not discuss them with anybody, not with this Odonan commander whom he would likely never see again after the next couple of days, or with his first officer, or with Counselor Quintollez, or even with Damiko herself. But if he did not talk, he was worried that other members of the crew might talk for him. Some would have to recognize what he did, or failed to do.
Padda spoke up again, as she slipped the padd across the desk. "Captain, this is a message from Councilor Chiang. As you know, she was the starship commander who had to deal with the situation at Norg, and whose actions resulted in the Odonans being trapped for sixty-one years at that planet. She would've spoken to you personally, but she's involved with matters relating to the war right now."
Thorpe turned it on. Padda had already had the councilor's worlds translated into English. "To Captain Thorpe of the Federation starship Athena," he read out loud, even though he was sure that Padda had read this. "Sixty-one years ago, I made what I believe to be an error of judgement during the mission to Norg, and the error I made condemned thousands of inhabitants of that planet and two of my crew, to lives on a distant and inaccessible planet. For so long, I had wanted to find a way to recover them, and bring them back home, as that would be the way to right the wrong. I thank you for what you did. I thank you for helping those lost people return home, and I am grateful for you that your people, the inhabitants of Adamsburg, did not have to endure what the inhabitants of Norg had to, due to your prompt and effective actions. Although I am saddened by the likelihood that those few who were in fact not recovered are truly forever lost, that is tempered by the fact that many, many others are given the chance to continue their lives at home, as it should be. A burden that has been on my mind for sixty-one years has been lifted, due to your actions. Some day, captain, when you come to Odona, and if our schedules permit, I would like to talk to you and thank you in person for your actions in helping my fellow Odonans, and your people too. Thank you, Councilor Hualei Chiang, of the Suder Highlands, Alarashada." Looking up, Thorpe added, "She had to endure her own mistake for so long?"
"Indeed," Padda remarked. "I had heard that Councilor Chiang had employed a great deal of effort and resources in finding a way to get those people back. It was always on her mind."
"And that's what I got to look forward to?"
"But you succeeded."
"I wonder about that," the captain said, but any further conversation was interrupted by his commbadge chirping. He tapped it, saying, "Thorpe here."
"Psakolaps, sir. I thought I should let you know, as Commander Matsubara has regained consciousness."
"Understood. I'll be there shortly." He was already standing. "Captain, I hope that you understand, but I need to... speak to Lieutenant Commander Matsubara."
"I understand, captain. I've been told."
Within minutes, Thorpe entered sickbay, and headed to the ward area. Psakolaps was just outside the curtained area where Matsubara had been resting. "How is she?" the captain asked.
"Awake, but still recovering," the doctor replied. "So far, my initial assessment stands, as it seems she has suffered no long-term or permanent effects from what happened to her." Thorpe simply nodded, as Psakolaps gestured for the captain to enter.
Thorpe went behind the curtains. His science officer, and his close friend-and even lover-from the earliest days in the Academy, laid on the bed, the blanket covering most of her body, and a sleeveless garment covering the rest. She looked better than she had the last time he had seen her. More importantly, she was awake, and smiled at his presence. Just seeing that, Thorpe felt a tremendous weight lifted off of his shoulders. He almost felt like Councilor Chiang must have felt knowing she had trapped those people sixty-one years ago, but his burden was so much easier to lift. The relief he felt seemed to fill his whole body, and he felt a sense of happiness, even joy, that was a rare moment in the life of a starship commander, especially in wartime.
"How do you feel?" he asked, walking towards her.
"A little stiff," she answered, her voice soft. "I think I'm not fully there yet, still feeling a little uneasy. The doctor said that recovery might take ten days or so. I guess I'll be on light or absent duty until then."
"I'd say so," Thorpe said, as he sat down on the chair that had been placed beside the bed, and which he had used to watch her while she was unconscious. He looked at her, intensely even, and she turned to look at him. Her eyes showed her strength, he thought. He was sure of that.
"When I woke up," she started, "I was surprised that I was on the Athena. I thought that this was the lander, but no, it's the ship. We're all back. The mission is over, isn't it?"
"Yes."
"Was it successful?"
In Thorpe's mind, it was successful. Matsubara was back with him on the Athena, but those were thoughts that could never be shared. "It was mostly successful," he finally said. "I've learned from Captain Padda of the Bluestar that the planet and its technology were likely destroyed, ultimately because of the tricobalt device."
"So the Dorans are all gone?"
"Except for those that you helped flee to some other planet."
"Oh?"
Puzzled, Thorpe asked, "Don't you remember?"
"Actually, I don't. My memories are not... consistent. The clearest one was shooting that Doran man, with a phaser, at full power, to protect Lieutenant Guerrero. I remember that. I remember a Doran, Teklensho was his name... he was my... guard, my escort. There was this uprising, and then... something happened. Someone attacked. I don't remember that. My memories are indistinct. I told the doctor about that. He said it might've been the alien weapon, the thermolyne, or something. I don't know. Maybe they'll come back."
Feeling a little concerned now, Thorpe asked, "You don't remember anything?"
"I remember going into the transit system. Were a group of Dorans with me? Was Teklensho? I don't remember. After that, it's just a blank."
"Then there was damage?"
"I hope not, I don't know," Matsubara said.
"What about before that?"
"From the time I shot that man, and going back, it's all there, all normal. I remember that golf shot in the holodeck before this whole thing started. That's clear. Everything is normal. I just don't remember the last couple of hours-the last couple of conscious hours." Matsubara looked about, and then remembered one other thing. "But I had my tricorder with me. Surely there is information on that. That might help me remember."
"Unfortunately," Thorpe started, "when you were shot by the alien weapon, the weapon that caused this in you, it also scrambled the memory cells on the tricorder. Rodall examined it in detail, and came up with nothing. He couldn't recover anything."
"Oh," sighed the woman. She rolled back onto her bed, and pulled the blanket up a little higher. She continued to clench the blanket with her hands, and did not mind when Thorpe put his hands on hers, and leaned a little closer.
"But we were successful. We got the people back, most of them anyway."
"But I just hope... I did something successful. I hate to think that people like Teklensho, and his family, deserve the fate that the aliens wanted. Now I remember that too. They deserved a chance to live."
"As we all do."
"And I'll never know if I succeeded, where they went, nothing. If they went somewhere, what part of the galaxy? I'd like to know. It's missing from my life now."
"I believe that you succeeded."
"Your word?"
"You can always trust my word," Thorpe said. "You know that."
Matsubara felt tired, and knew that she would have to rest soon. "Yes, I know that. I've always known that."
